Two Things Can Be True At Once

You can use your planner AND you can not use your planner

Just before Halloween I thought, “Oh shit! I better get going with the 2024 self-love planners if I’m going to do these again!” As much as I aspire to be the type of person who can map big projects out over a year and break them into manageable tasks along a realistic timeline I just….am not. My long awaited ADHD/ASD assessment¹ confirmed this in September.

My ADHD brain needs the *drama* and adrenaline rush of a deadline to get stuff done. My autistic brain needs the external accountability of announcing that I’m going to do something to give myself no other option than to see it through. Sometimes that works in my favor and sometimes it is very unhealthy.

I’m choosing to believe that getting hyper fixated on the 2024 Dear Self With Love planners was a healthy move for me this past month. As the world is being washed in unimaginable grief, I held onto the tiny little thread of hope that I can keep creating this tool that is with people every day. Helping them to take care of themselves so that they can keep showing up.

I started editing the InDesign document, doing test prints, organizing my materials and put together a feedback form to collect experiences from folks who used the planner in 2023. As the feedback rolled in I noticed two trends.

Some folks were using it almost daily ~ almost to their surprise! One person in particular shared that they had never been great with staring at a blank page in the journal but the bite sized prompts peppered throughout the days, weeks and months were the perfect size to commit to. They were delighted to realize they’ve been able to maintain this kind of practice almost for a full year!

Other folks had really fallen off after the first couple of months and expressed that were embarrassed to share that with me. In exchange for their honesty, I told them that there was a point in the middle of my year where I didn’t even open my planner for three months and that I get it…there is nothing to be embarrassed about.

Falling out of helpful and healthy rhythms can be really hard. Partially because we suspend the support that rhythm was giving us but more so because we beat ourselves up for it. What if instead we could choose to believe that we lean into tools when we need them most? That the effort of returning to something that works for us is so much more powerful than the self-talk of “well if you just wouldn’t have quit in the first place…”

Practices of self-love and self-care are continuous homecomings in a world that tests, pulls and stretches us — always asking us to abandon ourselves first. Sure, we might be very bad at these little habits and rituals. We might be very inconsistent. But the effort of trying alone sends a strong message that we’re worth prioritizing.

Little by little the momentum builds. First in the small moments. Then in the hours, days and weeks. It takes time to change habits and make a routine muscle memory.

So remember, as we approach that time of year that is all about fresh starts and new beginnings, two things can be true at once. Not everything has to be so rigidly black and white.

You can intend to use your planner daily AND realize that it still can support you on a more infrequent basis. You can intend to go to yoga tomorrow morning AND realize that your body will tell you exactly what you need when you wake up. You can plan to cook tonight AND you can reroute and order in if the day gets away from you. The effort alone of building more you time into your days, even just the knowing that the possibility is there, is a major step in the direction of choosing you.

If you’re thinking of making more you time with a 2024 self-love planner this year, I’d be honored to assemble one for you and ship it to your door with the most amount of love I can muster. I’m really proud of the updates that I’ve woven into this 2.0 version and can’t wait to share them with you! I’m beyond grateful to those of you who ventured into this big experiment with me in 2023 and am humbled that we get to do it again and invite more folks along for the ride!

The planners will be for sale while supplies last! And I currently have a Shop Small 25% off sale happening until Tuesday the 28th if you’re in the mood to grab yours (or go gift shopping!) early!

With Love,

Jenna

1. After lots of self-education and conversations with loved ones who are also neurodivergent I started my own research on the topic of how women are often misdiagnosed with mood disorders (if you’re new here I was diagnosed with Bipolar in my early 20s). Neurodiversity often isn’t even considered. When I really dug in I knew I’d eventually want a professional assessment given my history. There were no assessors within my health insurance. I decided to wait for other options rather than paying thousands of dollars out of pocket to go out of network. About 18 months into waiting and on a different health plan my therapist recommended the most amazing virtual assessor. We got connected, had a consult and scheduled a 7 hour day in the middle of September. It was a life changing. Nothing in my actual reality changed, yet I have a completely new understanding of my brain, my body, my inner world. I never thought I’d tell you this in a newsletter about the new planners…but here it is! I’m not sure I’m ready to share more just yet, but soon…I will.